(Humpty Hump)
Good googily goo
Look what the cat dragged in
The mack's back in, we snap-crack in
We got the jokes for you
Uh, look who the Hump bumped into
The old one-two, rhyme sayer, the paper maker
Biz lay the vapours

(Biz Markie)
I'm the vapour sprayer for the himilayas
The M-iza A-ya R-iza K-aya
I'm the mayor
Leavin' emcees in a ditch

(Humpty Hump)
So get ready, we 'bout to start a fight in this bitch

(Biz Markie)
Humpty dumpty had a fight with his moms
He broke both her legs and both of her arms
Tidy Bowl Man tried to throw a fit
I told his punk ass he was full of Shhhh...

(Humpty Hump)
Shut your mouth biz
See you're allways trying to take it further
I heard you bit a burger, with a funky worm in it
well you had to play stupid 'cause you didn't clear the sample
and lordy lord, got you pushing hot dogs

(Biz Markie)
Tupac was the only one that was living large
And Humpty your nose is a two-car garage
I know you got sooooul
I heard you don't eat pussy you be eatin' booty hole

(Humpty Hump)
No my nose be in the booty, my tounge be in her vertical smile
I heard your sister had sex with Colin Powell

(Biz Markie)
Your moms don't brush her teeth
I heard her breath was strong

(Humpty Hump)
Yo you wrong

(Both)
Why can't we just get along?

Why can't we be friends, why can't we be friends
Why can't we just get along?
Why can't we be friends, why can't we be friends
The odd couple

(Biz Markie)
The city so nice, they had to name it twice
New York, New York, the land of lights
We got the fashion, the widget, the project ditches
The Apollo, the Broadway, The Garden, the Pictures

(Humpty Hump)
So? We got the palm trees, Gs being Hollywood swingin' large
Cars around the block with the stars on the sidewalk
Every stop lights a show case, not lexuses
Brothers in Hummers following other friends in Benzesus

(Biz Markie)
Ya, that's cool, Y'all doin' your thing
But look what they did to that man Rodney King
They beat him, and stomped him, like a bunch of grapes
when I seen him he looked like the Planet of the Apes

(Humpty Hump)
Ya you right, police don't act tight but in the riots yo
California niggas wasn't scared to go
at poh poh

(Biz Markie)
So yo, I'll take you down like Mavis
Every Burrough is Thurough, don't forget Larry Davis

(Both, trading lines, Humpty is first)
We got Dre and Quincy Jones, homes

Primo and Puff, Hump

Easy E and Tupac nigga

Scott La Rock and Biggie nigga

Compton

Bronx

Oakland

Brooklyn Bridge

Golden Gate, plus Huey Newton

Malcom X

You got rats

Earth quakes

Well at least you'll never catch me wearing wigs in my videos

Oh, you don't have to go there, with your big, plastic nose

What about your big ass head?

What about your buck ass teeth?

Your moms so black, I looked at her and thought that i was asleep

Your nasty ass moms gave me ear infection over the phone

Come on man, why we can't get along?

Why can't we be friends, why can't we be friends
Why can't we just get along?
Why can't we be friends, why can't we be friends
The odd couple
(twice)